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The 5 Relationship Myths You Need to Stop Falling For Immediately

The 5 Relationship Myths You Need to Stop Falling For Immediately

Are you falling for these all-too-common relationship myths?

Drop them right away for happier relationships (and happier life). Text One day I came across an interview of a guy where the interviewer asks him how did he feel after achieving success.

Where does romance sit in your life?
Do your intimate relationships mean a lot?

Maybe they’re the very center of your universe. At first glance, you may think this is normal and that it means you’ll get that fairy tale one day. But it doesn’t. Forcing relationships that don’t work, or forcing our happiness on someone else, is not how we get that dream love we’ve been searching for. Want to be loved, valued, and celebrated by someone who matters? Get beyond the myths to better relationship behaviors and beliefs.

The 5 relationship myths you need to drop immediately.

If we could stop perpetuating these myths, we really could build a better life for ourselves. Unfortunately, too many people believe that someone else will make them happy. Or that getting the romance right means everything else will fall into place.

That’s not how reality works, and it’s not how love works, either. If you’re looking for a relationship that can stand the test of time, then let go of these myths and focus on building a better love from the inside out.

Your partner will make you happy
So many people are convinced that the right partner will make them happy. Maybe they got close to the “right” relationship once or twice, and they still remember those early feelings that made them giddy. Or maybe they just prefer to invest in fairy tales.

Whatever the reason, this is one of the most insidious relationship myths that you need to let go of. The right partner isn’t going to make you happy, and they won’t heal any wounds. A partner can only complement the happiness you have already created for yourself. Anything else is temporary and superficial.

The right partner prevents problems
Have you ever been in a rocky point in a relationship and thought to yourself, “If I was dating the “perfect” person, this would have never happened.” If you have, you’re not alone. Many people think that finding the ideal partner means they will never face challenges in their relationships again.

Finding the right partner will not prevent you from experiencing problems in your relationships or your life. That’s not how it works. Even the best relationships have difficulties.

Erase this myth from your core belief panel. Instead, know that building the ideal relationship will make facing the inevitable challenges easier. That’s the whole point. We aren’t building a village to escape the hardships. We’re building a village to better navigate the challenges that are a part of life and love.

There is a soul mate out there
If you think that there’s just one soul mate out there for you, you’d be sadly mistaken. It’s just not mathematically possible. Think about it. There are billions of people alive on this planet. More than one of them has what it takes to match your core relationship needs.

Instead of feeding into this idea of one impossible, inescapable partner, know that there will always be more than one person out there who has what it takes to provide you with a happy partnership.

This takes nothing away from your current relationship, but it doesn’t leave you tied to them, either. When you understand you have options, you aren’t beholden to the wrong person. But you can also appreciate the right person that much more and value the place they hold in your life.

Romantic love is unconditional
Have you ever heard the phrase “true love is unconditional”? Think again. Our relationships should always come with core conditions. You have standards for the way you want to be treated, for how you want to feel. We all have conditions, and we have to align those conditions to build the right relationships.

What are the conditions that you need met? Do you need a partner that is supportive? Affectionate? Someone who shows they are proud of you, or that always makes sure they’re home at 5PM?

You can’t turn someone into the partner who values and meets these conditions. But you can find the person who values and meets those needs.

Set conditions on your relationships and make sure they are aligned to your true values and core needs. Then, ensure that any partner you invest a serious amount of time and effort into can meet or celebrate those conditions, readily as they are.

Relationships heal past hurts
Don’t be fooled into thinking you can fix the wounds of past relationships with the love of a new relationship. Rebounds aren’t fix-alls, and they were never meant to be. Your past is your past, and those hurts get resolved when you do the internal work to fix them. An external partner won’t change that fact.

If you want to get over your ex and what happened — do it before you bring another person into the picture. A new love won’t negate the trauma and the upset that your last partner brought into your life. Keep them separate and stop expecting your partner to be a magical eraser. Your past is your responsibility to deal with…not theirs.

Putting it all together…
Relationship mythology is one of the most common factors that keep us repeating toxic cycles of love and attachment. We are fed these myths from a young age, even by our parents who struggle against them in their own personal lives. These myths derail us, though, and prevent us from being truly happy.

Don’t expect one person to make you happy in this life. Don’t expect a relationship to heal the wounds that are haunting you. Instead, look inside for the sense of happiness you want to create in the world.

A relationship can only complement and help to build on the sense of joy and power you create for yourself. Strive always to manifest a life that is entirely yours, so that you can find the right person who is ready to embrace you and support you in the ways which are most needed. Hold out for a love worth fighting for.

 Photo by SD CL​

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